Ohio, Will Your Vote Count?

August 2016

I am a veteran of the hanging chad debacle in South Florida in the Presidential election of 2000. To this day, I wonder whether my ballot is one that was thrown out because of an incomplete separation of the chad. It was that experience that taught me the importance of voting and how important every vote is.

I was shocked to learn last week from the Cincinnati Enquirer (“Lawsuit: Ballots discarded for minor errors in Ohio,” August 4, 2016 print edition) that Ohio is appealing a federal decision that favored voting rights advocates. There were two parts of this matter that I found disturbing.

First, each county gets to decide which ballots are discarded as illegitimate. Ballots can be deemed illegitimate if there is an issue with the informational fields, such as date of birth or address. In 2014, according to the Cincinnati Enquirer, 2,800 ballots were deemed illegitimate and thrown out. In close races, that is enough to change the outcome of an election. In some Ohio counties, if a voter signs his or her name rather than prints it, the ballot can be thrown out. Forget to check the absentee ballot box? Missing a zip code or one number of your zip code? Depending where you live, your vote could be tossed out. There is no course teaching people how to complete a ballot. In addition, the manner of voting has changed over the years, and it is quite easy for anyone, especially younger and older voters, to make a small mistake.

Second, why is the state of Ohio wasting money on appealing a federal court decision that existing Ohio law was unconstitutional? The federal ruling is very consistent with a number of federal voter rights rulings and it seems unlikely that the State of Ohio will win on appeal. Federal courts have ruled that many of these laws passed to prevent voter fraud are unnecessary and have a differential (and therefore unlawful) impact on non-Whites, the elderly, disabled, and lower-income citizens.

Please vote in November. It is important that your voice is heard and your vote counted. If you live in Ohio, please make sure to verify that your information is correct and complete so your vote will count. It is Summer 2016 and that is the view from here. 

40th Annual Dayton Pride Festival

June 3-5, 2016 was the 40^th annual Dayton Pride festival. Friday evening, June 3, kicked off the experience with a beer and food truck event in Courthouse Square downtown, which served as the center of Dayton Pride festivities. Later Friday night, there was a .5 kilometer bar crawl sponsored by Svedka vodka. Saturday festivities included a breakfast at MJ’s on Jefferson Street, the Pride parade at noon, Pride festival from 12-4 pm in Courthouse Square, followed by the Dayton Gay Men’s Chorus at 8 pm in the Victoria Theatre. Sunday activities included a 5k run/walk sponsored by PFLAG and a round robin kickball tournament from noon to 6 pm.

I recently relocated to Cincinnati from Florida. I have attended Gay Pride celebrations in multiple cities, mostly in South Florida, but on June 4^th, I attended my first ever Pride event in Ohio at Dayton Pride. Not only was this my first Ohio Pride event, but my first trip to Dayton as well. I tried not to have too many expectations as to what it would be like. But I did know that it would be the smallest Pride event I have ever attended.

I arrived in Dayton on Saturday around 11:30 am to watch the parade staging activities. There was palpable excitement in the air and choruses of “Happy Pride” rang out between friends and strangers alike. The sun was shining, although rain clouds threatened and finally burst in mid-afternoon. The visible police presence smoothed traffic issues for attendees and Dayton residents to minimize driving delays. After visiting the staging area, I walked along the first street of the parade route for several blocks, soaking in the atmosphere and listening in on conversations. Visitors to MJ’s spilled onto the outdoor patio, which provided a great viewing spot for the parade. Large and small rainbow flags were on sale from street vendors as well as other pride items. I found a spot on the curb towards the beginning of the parade route to watch, take notes, and pictures. Just down the sidewalk from me, a 30-something individual explained to her friend that she had been attending Dayton Pride events since the age of 16. She recounted her amazement at how Dayton Pride events and attendance had grown through the years, a sentiment echoed by a number of people during the afternoon festival.

The parade began a few minutes after noon, and for the next 35 minutes, individuals, floats, and other vehicles followed the parade route ending in Courthouse Square at Festival booths and vendors. 

There were visible representatives from all spectrums of the LGBTQ community as well as a number of community allies. A number of parade participants were from various church organizations, such as The Center for Spiritual Living,  Unitarian Universalist church, and David’s United Church of Christ. Walgreens and Kroger had large contingents as well. The color green seemed to be the theme of the day, as several organizations, such as the Dayton Gay Men’s Chorus, marched in matching green t-shirts. Equality Ohio had a visible presence, as well as GLSEN of Greater Dayton, PFLAG, and LGBTQ members from local colleges and Wright State University. Floats for Dayton bars were sponsored by Tito’s and Stoli vodka. I was dismayed and disappointed that HRC (Human Rights Campaign), my favorite civil rights organization, seemed to be missing in action in the parade, although they had a small booth at the festival. Due to the GLSEN contingent and student marchers from a local school, there were a number of children marching in the parade as well. These children were made to feel welcome at the festival in an area for children and families fittingly called “Rainbow Land,” which was new to the festival this year.

As the marchers rounded the final street corner and entered Courthouse Square, they were greeted on the left by several individuals holding signs that read “Homo sex is sin Romans 1” and “Repent of your sins Believe the gospel Obey Jesus Mark 1:15.” There was also an individual with a megaphone as well, yelling at people to repent or face hellfire. Instinctively, parade viewers with large rainbow flags moved in front of the picketers, shielding them from the marchers’ view. I was somewhat shocked to see the picketers, as I was unable to recall any other gay event I had attended where there were picketers, especially a Gay Pride event. Throughout the afternoon, most of the festival attendees ignored the picketers, although later in the afternoon they became louder and more unruly and aggressive. In response to their increasing volume an aggressive tone, the emcee asked festival goers to treat the protestors in a loving and civil manner. I was proud to see that happening for the most part, although I heard multiple comments within the crowd that the protestors should be physically removed from the festivities. Their presence was a tangible symbol of the work that is still needed in promoting LGBT civil rights in Ohio.

During the festival, I was able to speak with a number of individuals about the work of their organizations and what the festival meant to them, personally. Equality Ohio volunteers were signing up individuals for mailing and volunteer lists. They provided pamphlets on a number of current legal issues affecting the Ohio LGBT community, such as bathroom bills and conversion therapy. A member of the Center for Spiritual Living (Greater Dayton) reported that this was her sixth appearance at Dayton Pride, but she believed the Center had participated for at least the past eight years. Walgreens employees conveyed to me that it was important for them to have a visible presence; they view this type of community outreach as essential to show their support for equality. Medical students at Wright State University expressed they were visiting classes of their fellow medical students and conveying to them some of the unique experiences and challenges of the LGBT community in interacting with medical professionals. Kevin Mabry, the Co-Chairman of GLSEN of Greater Dayton, explained to me the exciting and important work they are doing in middle and high schools. I hope to provide more in-depth interviews and information about this important work in future issues.

Although I was only able to attend the Dayton Pride festivities on Saturday, I was buoyed by the optimistic tone of the festival goers and volunteers at the festival. Although we realize there is a long way to go in our journey to full equality for all members of our community, it is an exciting time to be an LGBT American. Attendance at Dayton Pride was robust and the younger generation was well-represented. Although admittedly different from my past Gay Pride experiences, I was able to appreciate the hope and optimism conveyed by festival attendees and volunteers alike. In the wake of the Orlando tragedy on June 12th, I have realized that these events are even more important for our community. It is vitally important to convey hope, love, optimism, pride, support, and acceptance as we connect and reconnect with our LGBTQ brothers and sisters and heterosexual allies. Although Pride month has brought positive and negative experiences for our community, we must always remember that love and civility are the only ways to overcome the hate directed at our community.  

Porter, N. (July 2016).  Dayton celebrates 40^th Pride Fest. The Gay Word, 25(2), 22-23. 

Too many are dying from gun violence

Another day, another shooting. Tragic stories about gun violence abound. However, a recent tragedy unfolded in my own backyard.

On Jan. 12, a 73-year old Cincinnati father dropped his son off early at the bus stop, due to snowy weather, and returned home. Later he texted his 14-year-old son again to make sure he was on the bus. The son responded with a phone call assuring his father he was on the bus to school. However, unbeknownst to his father, Georta Mack circled back to his house and hid in the basement.

According to The Cincinnati Enquirer, soon after 6 a.m., his father heard noises coming from the basement and grabbed his .45-caliber gun. After going to the basement to investigate, he opened a closet door and Georta jumped out and yelled “Boo!” His father fired, striking him in the neck and killing him. The transcript of the father’s anguished 911 call is heartbreaking. Prosecutors announced on Jan. 13 the father would not face charges for killing his son.

Earlier this month, the statistics for 2015 were released: Shootings in Cincinnati were up 28 percent over 2014; homicides increased 13 percent. These tragedies happen on a daily basis. In October 2015, The Washington Post reported that, as of the 274th day of 2015, there had been 294 mass shootings. Mass murders due to gun violence occur most often in metro areas. Since 2013, Austin, Texas, is the only city in the U.S. with a population of 100,000 or greater that has not had a mass shooting. However, only 2 percent of overall gun violence deaths occur in mass shootings.

According to the TheTrace.org, as of Dec. 23 there had been 12,942 deaths in 2015 due to gun violence, an average of 36 deaths every day. While the news was dominated by reports of European and domestic terrorism in 2015, in the previous 10 years only 71 people died in the U.S. from terrorist incidents. There were 301,797 deaths in America due to gun violence during the same period.

Every traumatic death is a tragedy, but why do we as Americans not have a better sense of perspective? This means that people in the U.S., from 2005 to 2015, were more than 4,000 times more likely to be killed by guns than in a terrorist incident. These statistics represent mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, children, aunts, uncles, grandmothers, grandfathers and friends. Each death has created a ripple effect in our communities, such that many lives are changed forever.

Many of these shootings kill individuals under the age of 18, snuffing out the unlimited promise and potential of these young lives. In 2015, an average of two children were killed every day by a shooting; 75 percent of these children were under the age of 12. Scarier still, in an average week in 2015 a toddler under the age of 3 shot someone, often him- or herself, after accessing an unsecured loaded gun. Many times the toddlers injure or kill themselves, but they also have killed other people as well.

According to The Cincinnati Enquirer, the Transportation Security Administration announced recently that 2,653 guns were found at security checkpoints at U.S. airports in 2015. More than 82 percent (2,198) of these guns were loaded. Unloaded guns are allowed in checked baggage, but must be declared. Loaded weapons are forbidden, as are guns in carry-on baggage. The ramifications of these statistics are startling. These only represent guns that were detected by the TSA. As might be expected, two of the top five airports with the most confiscated guns were in Texas: Dallas (1st) and Houston (3rd). Airports in Atlanta (2nd), Denver (4th) and Phoenix (5th) rounded out the top five.

So consider this: The next time you are on a domestic flight, imagine that some of your fellow passengers are carrying a loaded weapon. If that makes you feel safer, perhaps you should work to change the current laws regarding guns and air travel. However, for many of us, the thought of fellow passengers carrying a loaded weapon on our flights is a sobering and scary thought.

Let us not pretend that racism is not at the heart of this issue. While black men comprise about 6 percent of the U.S. population, they account for 50 percent of deaths through gun violence.  Reflect upon this: What would the response be if 150,898 white men had been killed by guns from 2005 through 2015? Would the response have been different?  I think we all know in our heart that it would be quite different. The news media would be full of stories about the hunting of white men and Congress would be drafting and passing legislation on gun control to stem these predators stalking the most powerful members of our society.

There are no easy answers. Historians point to the founding of this country and the role guns played in doing so. Early American settlers were able to steal land from the Native Americans due to the advanced weaponry of guns. As Americans traveled westward during the expansion, often guns were the difference between life and death, useful both for killing animals for food and warding off animal and human predators. Gun violence has played a large role in our collective American DNA.

Our attitudes toward life and death are different than other first-world countries, as evidenced by our continued use of the death penalty in many states. Meanwhile, our counterparts around the world shake their collective heads and wonder when Americans will finally wake up and decide that too many people have died because of gun violence.

Recently, I have read of conservatives railing against any form of gun restrictions and proclaiming that owning guns is “a God-given right.”  Really?!  I will never understand why it is that many of the same people who claim to be “pro-life” are often also the same ones who claim there should be no limits on military spending or gun rights.

There is also a Constitutional argument for gun control. The founders specified in the Second Amendment, “A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.”

I know my opinion is not a popular one, but I believe the Second Amendment provides the right to bear arms only in the context of belonging to a state militia. This opinion is shared by some scholars as well.

Regardless of one’s belief about the right to bear arms, I think we can all agree too many people are dying due to gun violence. I encourage each of you to think about what your responsibility is to help address this issue.

Porter, N. (March 2016). Too many are dying from gun violence. The Gay Word, 24(8), 11. http://thegayword.com/many-dying-gun-violence/

Reaction to anti-conversion bill a surprise

A Conversation with Cincinnati Councilman Chris Seelbach

By Natalie Porter

According to his biography on the Cincinnati City Council website, Councilman Seelbach was a key player in the effort of repeal Article XII in Cincinnati. Article XII denied legal protection to gays and lesbians in the City and led many gay men to leave Cincinnati (http://www.npr.org/2014/04/30/307967244/gays-in-cincinnati-from-second-class-citizens-to-fully-accepted). This anti-gay law cost the City over $25 million in lost revenue, an estimate provided by the Visitor’s bureau. Councilman Seelbach grew up in Kentucky and began advocating for LGBT rights as a college student at Xavier University in Cincinnati. He became the first openly gay City Council member in Ohio in 2011.

On February 9, 2016, I sat down with the City Councilman in his office in City Hall to discuss his personal experiences with conversion therapy, how he became involved in local politics, and the process of getting this bill passed.

You can link to the article here: http://thegayword.com/reaction-anti-conversion-bill-surprise/

Part two of this interview (in the April 2016 issue) will focus on the process of getting the anti-conversion therapy bill passed in Cincinnati.

Porter, N. (April 2016). Reaction to anti-conversion bill a surprise. The Gay Word, 24(9), 18. http://thegayword.com/reaction-anti-conversion-bill-surprise/

Official experienced 'conversion' attempt

A Conversation with Cincinnati Councilman Chris Seelbach

By Natalie Porter

In an article published in the January issue of The Gay Word, I reported that the Cincinnati City Council voted to ban conversion therapy tactics for individuals under the age of 18, in a 7-2 vote on December 9, 2015. City Councilman Chris Seelbach introduced this bill to the Council. As a new Ohio resident (and resident of the Midwest), I wanted to learn more about Councilman Seelbach, his experiences with conversion therapy, and how the passage of this bill came about.

According to his biography on the Cincinnati City Council website, Councilman Seelbach was a key player in the effort of repeal Article XII in Cincinnati. Article XII denied legal protection to gays and lesbians in the City and led many gay men to leave Cincinnati (http://www.npr.org/2014/04/30/307967244/gays-in-cincinnati-from-second-class-citizens-to-fully-accepted). This anti-gay law cost the City over $25 million in lost revenue, an estimate provided by the Visitor’s bureau. Councilman Seelbach grew up in Kentucky and began advocating for LGBT rights as a college student at Xavier University in Cincinnati. He became the first openly gay City Council member in Ohio in 2011.

On February 9, 2016, I sat down with the City Councilman in his office in City Hall to discuss his personal experiences with conversion therapy, how he became involved in local politics, and the process of getting this bill passed.

You can link to part one of this conversation here: http://thegayword.com/official-experienced-conversion-attempt/

  Part two of this interview (in the April 2016 issue) will focus on the process of getting the anti-conversion therapy bill passed in Cincinnati.

Porter, N. (March 2016). Official experienced ‘conversion’ attempt. The Gay Word, 24(8), 35. http://thegayword.com/official-experienced-conversion-attempt/

Cincy bans conversion therapy

While suicide is the second leading cause of death for 10- to 24-year olds, LGBTQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning) youth are at particular risk for suicide.  According to The Trevor Project (www.thetrevorproject.org), LGB youth commit suicide at a rate that is four times higher than their peers, while questioning youth commit suicide three times as often as their heterosexual counterparts.  The danger is even greater for transgender individuals.  Over 50% of transgender youth have reported serious thoughts about suicide and 1 in 4 have attempted to kill themselves.  The danger is enhanced for LBGTQ individuals who come from family backgrounds that reject non-heterosexuality and demand gender conformity.  These individuals have a suicide risk that is more than eight times higher than their LGB peers who come from families that accept non-heterosexuality and gender non-conformity.  Therefore, transgender individuals are at the highest risk of committing suicide.

In a case that made national and international headlines, Leelah Alcorn, a transgender teen from Ohio, committed suicide on December 28, 2014.  Leelah grew up in a very conservative Christian household in Kings Mill, Ohio.  Kings Mill is about 30 miles Northeast of Cincinnati.  Leelah requested that she be allowed to begin the transition process from male-to-female, but her family refused.  Instead, they forced Leelah to go to conversion therapy, removed her from her high school and limited her access to social media.  In short, they tried to arrange a living environment that was completely rejecting of non-heterosexuality and which demanded gender conformity.  Leelah killed herself by walking into traffic on a busy Interstate highway, three days after Christmas, and arranged for her suicide note to be publicized after her death.  Within hours of her death, her story made national and international headlines.

The stated aim of conversion therapy is to make non-heterosexual individuals deny their sexuality and only practice heterosexuality and gender conformity.  Therapists proclaim that individuals chose to be lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender and since it is a choice, individuals can choose heterosexuality and gender conformity.  Generally, conversion therapists are closely tied to religious organizations or churches and is based upon the belief that homosexuality and gender non-conformity is inherently sinful or evil. 

Conversion therapy as a legitimate form of therapy is widely rejected by the medical and mental health communities.  Fourteen years ago, the Surgeon General of the United States proclaimed that there was no scientific evidence that sexuality can be changed.  All of the mainstream medical (i.e., American Medical Association, American Psychiatric Association, American Academy of Pediatrics, and American Academy of Physician Assistants) and professional mental health associations (American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy, American Counseling Association, American Psychological Association, National Association of School Psychologists, National Association of Social Workers) have denounced the practice of conversion therapy.  In general, these associations have declared that not only is the practice of conversion therapy not based upon science, but it can actually cause harm to the individual receiving the “therapy.”  Medical associations have declared conversion therapy to be in violation of the Hippocratic Oath because it can cause harm to the individual.  In 1998 (17 years ago), the American Psychiatric Association stated that efforts to change an individual’s sexuality was in opposition to professional standards and in 2000 clarified that it was unethical to attempt to change sexual orientation.

The American Psychological Association, the professional association for psychologists and many master’s-level therapists, released guidelines in 2011 for working with LGBTQ clients.  Therapists who are APA members and practice conversion therapy are in direct violation of these guidelines (http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/guidelines.aspx) and in violation of the code of ethics (http://www.apa.org/ethics/code/index.aspx).  Therefore, a member of the APA who participates in conversion therapy is in danger of sanctions or losing membership in their professional association.

Exodus International, a leading proponent of conversion therapy in the United States, discontinued activities supporting conversion therapy and closed in 2013, after operating since the mid-to-late 1970s.  In 2012, the President of Exodus International issued an apology to conversion therapy participants for the harm the organization had caused them and stated unequivocally that conversion therapy does not work. 

On December 9, 2015 in a 7-2 vote, the Cincinnati City Council voted to ban conversion therapy within the city for individuals under the age of 18.  This bill was championed by Chris Seelbach, a City Council member who was himself subjected to conversion therapy.  Cincinnati joined the District of Columbia, California, Illinois, New Jersey and Oregon in prohibiting conversion therapy.  Protestors, including one City Council member, have vowed to overturn the ban and have threatened a lawsuit to end the ban.  They portend that the conversion therapy ban will have a chilling effect on free speech and freedom of religion.  They also argue that it takes away parental rights and the rights of LGBTQ youth who want to change their sexual orientation.

Free speech has constitutional limits.  An individual is not allowed to yell “fire” in a crowded building when no such danger exists, because it has the potential to harm individuals.  Think about that for a moment.  It has the potential to harm individuals.  Does conversion therapy have the potential to harm?  Absolutely, it does.

There is also legal precedent for limits to freedom of religion. Since 1982, there have been more than five dozen criminal cases prosecuted against parents who did not provide their child with appropriate medical treatment.  The government has an inherent interest in protecting the rights of children.  I propose that the government has a strong interest in preventing conversion therapy, because not only is it not scientifically-based but also has been shown to be harmful in many cases.  Causing harm to children is, by definition, child abuse.  Therefore, parents who force their children to attend conversion therapy and therapists who practice conversion therapy are guilty of placing a child in a potentially harmful situation, which is tantamount to child abuse.

The Constitution provides for specific freedoms of individuals in the United States.  However, by exercising those freedoms, one does not have the right to harm others.  If adults wish to participate in conversion therapy, that is their choice.  However, forcing a child who is already at tremendous risk of suicide due to LGBTQ status into a type of therapy that promotes the idea that the child is evil and must change is child abuse.  Conversion therapy can be dressed up as a matter of freedom of speech or religious freedom or parental rights by those who believe in it, but that is not the truth. 

The truth is that years of scientific research have not provided support for the usefulness of conversion therapy.  The truth is that none of the medical or professional associations believe that conversion therapy is helpful.  The truth is that even the leading Christian organization in this country that was dedicated to conversion therapy for more than 35 years has admitted wrongdoing.  The truth is that conversion therapy is harmful.  The truth is that parents who force their children into conversion therapy are committing child abuse. The truth is child abuse is not a parental right.  The truth is the government has every right to stop child abuse.

Porter, N. (January 2016). Cincy bans conversion therapy. The Gay Word, 24(7), 30. http://thegayword.com/cincy-bans-conversion-therapy/

Death Comes to Facebook

     As a Generation Xer, I have adapted to many of the current technologies.  Still, I remember the first time I sent an email (1992), buying my first computer while in college (my one and only Mac) and signing up for MySpace and Facebook.  I have a Twitter account that I don’t really use because I have frequently been misunderstood through texts.  I believe that Twitter would allow me the opportunity at times to be misunderstood on a larger scale.  Lately, I have even distanced myself from Facebook.

     While I am amazed and pleased for the most part with technology and how it has led to increased connectivity with those at a physical distance, there are some trends that I find disturbing.  For instance in a 13-month period from December 2013-January 2015, I was notified of the death of three relatives through announcements and comments on Facebook. 

     The first death, that of my stepmother, I saw myself after logging into Facebook.  My best friend from childhood posted a message remembering my stepmother that included RIP.  I didn’t have much contact with my stepmother.  I always thought she was a wonderful person and I was sorry to hear of her passing.  I am estranged from my father so I was not bothered as much in this instance.  Still it was an odd feeling.

     The second death was that of my paternal grandmother (my father’s mother).  I was working at the office when I received a text from my older brother.  Apparently several of my cousins had posted pictures and announced her passing on Facebook and my brother saw it.  No one in the family made any effort to contact us (my mom, my brothers or me).  I ended up calling my mother and notifying her of my grandmother’s death.  Although I didn’t fully realize it until later, this method of notification was very disturbing to me.

     The third death came earlier this year when one of two maternal aunts (my Mom’s sister) passed away unexpectedly.  It happened on a Saturday and I had not logged into Facebook at all that day.  I was having dinner with a friend and her family and when I left their house around 9:45 pm, I noticed I had received a text from my younger brother.  The text told me that he saw on Facebook that our aunt had died earlier in the day.  This time I was stunned.  Again, no one had bothered to contact me.  I texted my older brother early the next morning and then we spoke on the phone.  He did not know that our aunt had passed away either until my text.  After the conversation with my older brother, I left several voice mail messages for my mother.  She called me back later in the day and when asked why she hadn’t bothered to contact my brothers or me about my aunt’s death, she replied that she just assumed we would find out through Facebook and since she didn’t have any information about funeral arrangements she had planned to call when she had more information.

     At this point, I was completely overwhelmed.  Since when it is acceptable for family members to be notified of a loved one’s death through Facebook?  To me it is almost incomprehensible to allow someone to find out a loved one had passed through this medium.  I was just stunned by the lack of consideration.  My mother doesn’t have a Facebook account so she really doesn’t have any understanding of how Facebook works. 

     The cumulative weight of these deaths hit me hard and in my opinion was worsened by my feelings about how I was notified.  Our Internet connectedness seems to have led to a callousness regarding actual real time contact.  This is quite worrisome to me.  I am the first to admit that I have Facebook friends that I do not talk too.  Many of these are family members who I rarely see and I am friends with them on Facebook so I can find out about family news.  It is a way of monitoring news without having to take an active role unless I want to.  Still, as I watched family members interacting with each other in grief over these deaths I wondered why things like death couldn’t be worked out between family members offline rather than in a public forum like Facebook.  Although distant family members were able to express their support to the immediate family members, there was also infighting on Facebook between the immediate family members.  Again, this was disturbing to me.

     I do not think that I am a technophobe by any stretch of the imagination.  However, I do not wish to find out about the deaths of family members through Facebook.  Perhaps coincidentally, perhaps not, since January I have noticed that I have sharply decreased the amount of time I spend on Facebook.  Some weeks I will not visit Facebook at all.  I think that classical conditioning may be partly to blame.  In some way, Facebook has become connected to negativity and loss and I find myself with little desire to sign in.  Maybe some people are not or would not be disturbed by death notifications via Facebook.  All I know is that I am old enough to be revolted by the practice.  That is The View From Here.